Merch Promo feat. Jahn Smythe


JAHN: Fellow human sapiens. I, Jahn Smythe, normal human individual, am here to talk to you about something that all humans like us enjoy: purchasing clothing to cover our non-repulsive bodies and 2 dimensional objects that adhere to surfaces and other items containing text and/or images that I find appealing. We do this in order to indicate our knowledge and enjoyment of popular culture, and to conceal our interlocking physical bonding zones.

As a normal human person with only one possible shape for my physical form, I possess tens of thousands of clothing that I wear on my human limbs. Many of these clothing represent human groupings known as bands, which you may have heard of like I, Jahn Smythe, have.

But I have absorbed knowledge that there are other possible visual displays for torso coverings. As a friendly human, I bring you the information that such torso coverings can be purchased now by exchanging a series of specific numbers for the object.

If you visit store.neverrad.com, you can find a number of torso coverings and adhesive visual displays relating to the Never Rad Miscellany, as well as keychains, which can be worn in many ways on normal human bodies like mine.

If your human body requires a cloth layer to cover it and protect it from the environment, consider obtaining clothing from the Never Rad store. As a human person with teeth and only two optic nerves, I recommend these clothing for your body, for protection and to display your interests. Visit store.neverrad.com, input your secret numerals, provide your physical location, and you can receive a clothing just like me, Jahn Smythe, your friend and fellow blood-haver. Clothing is a necessary part of human processes; you should possess it as soon as possible!